I’m 21 years old, never worked before. My parents wanted me to focus on my studies; they’re afraid that being involved in extracurricular activities would jeopardize my grades. I don’t have any friends, so I never do stuff like the avg. person would do such as going out to see movies, or party, or go see games, and I lack social skills. I got made fun of for my looks and was perceived as retarded in high school and I feel ugly and self conscious. I am still a bit paranoid that people are criticizing me.

I am struggling to keep my GPA a 3.8 in college so that I can get into graduate school, even though I’m only taking two courses. I feel tired after getting home in the evening even though I know I have to study. I can’t seem to listen or follow what the professors are trying to teach me and I don’t know if it’s because I feel anxiety or pressured to get what they’re saying or if I’m slow. I do get it by sitting and thinking over the material at my own time. I read 10 pages per hour of chemistry textbook. Today the teacher made the classroom do an activity with a partner and only gave us a few minutes to read some direction for performing the activity. I couldn’t seem to be able to read it fast enough and comprehend it at the same time. I started freaking out and ended up not really reading it.

I feel depressed and out of league compared to others.